Photo: Erin Leigh McConnell


So a person in recent NLP Practitioner training in Portland came up to me and asked the following: “I don’t know what to do. I am in a relationship that is wonderful for me in the Mental, Emotional and Physical aspects, but I know someone else who is perfect for me in the Spiritual aspect. What do I do?”




This question came after I talked about Huna and about the four aspects of who you are (which I also reference in this article). I also talked then about treasuring your connections, and it struck a chord with this individual.


To start, we are very clear based on the work of Dr. Bruce Lipton, that energy (which flows from the Spiritual aspect) affects the body first and foremost. Furthermore, from my lineage of Huna, I can tell you that this type of connection is very powerful and special.


Let me give you some background.


Huna and Connections


I have been teaching Huna since the 90’s and practicing it for a lot longer. We actually ran our first workshop in Kona back in 1989, and since then, we have conducted 2 Huna trainings every year.  Each one is amazing.


There are so many reasons why people come to Huna. Some come because they want to connect with the ancient teachings. Others come to learn how to work with energy or be initiated in the Huna symbols. Others come to learn Ho’oponopono, something we teach and the subject I researched for my dissertation.


However, one reason that also comes up time and time again is connection. I actually can’t remember if I have talked about the importance of connections here on my blog or not, so if I did, here I go again!


We have a Spiritual aspect to our lives. Some call it energy or religion, and while I am not concerned with the label, I am concerned with the concept. This aspect is at the top and creates a trickle-down effect. We have the Spiritual aspect, the Mental aspect, the Emotional aspect and the Physical body. And the energy flows down in that order.


  1. Energy (or Spiritual)
  2. Mental
  3. Emotional
  4. Physical


I believe, as many others do, that we are spiritual beings having a physical experience. Understanding these different aspects of who we are helps us to connect to higher consciousness. I have also dedicated my first 3 books to learning how to become an authentic individual true to your Self, or spiritual nature.


Here is how most start the connection:


Most people begin the process of connecting with someone in the opposite approach to how we should. In an ideal world, we would connect spiritually first. However, we don’t.


I have known people that make a physical connection, and while that may be fun and occupy some time, it tends to fizzle out. As soon as the person explores the emotions, they may find incompatibility. For example, you see someone attractive, things are going great, you are flirting and pretty soon you find out that emotionally, they are not there… Bye bye!


Some people get the physical, and then make an emotional connection, and it’s wonderful! And what often occurs next is the mental exploration of compatibility. Again, some find it and others don’t. The thoughts just do not blend well! So, bye bye!


When a couple does make it through the physical, emotional and mental, you are left with the spiritual. Do they connect there? Is there a fire? The ones that do are amazing and so fortunate because then the flame is burning for them and their relationship. The ones that don’t find the connection there seem to drop the energy and you see no spark, no charge.


Soul Buddies!


The examples of people starting from the bottom and working their way up is endless, and one of the big things that I see time and time again at Huna is students feeling what they call a “deeper connection” with someone.


No implication here about these relationships becoming intimate. In fact, that has only happened twice in the 24 years we have conducted the Huna workshops. More often, it is just the joy of being around a similar spirit. To be attracted to this type of information, you have to have an “old soul.” And when you are around your friends (soul buddies) it feels so amazing.


As I have recently written here on my blog, this path can be somewhat lonely. If you have ever felt that you were alone around so many people, because you could not talk about what is in your heart and soul, you know what I am talking about now.


You see, the spiritual aspect is the highest vibration that you can connect on with another person. This is the element of fire, so that fire has the ability to warm the heart and soul. The magnificent thing about connecting on this level is that, because it’s the highest vibration, it connects us with a lot of energy. And I mean A LOT!


As I said above, we know from the work of Dr. Bruce Lipton that energy has the most profound effect on the physical body.


So as the energy from the spiritual comes down and moves through the mental aspect, your connection tends to be beautiful. This is because it is guided from spirit or source.


As the energy moves down through the emotional aspect, you tend to have a calming experience and a warmth of the heart and emotions. Again, this influence comes from where the initial connection is made.


Finally, as the energy continues trickling down, it is looking to complete the circuit and make a connection to the body or physical realm. That’s when you find a comfort level with that person where you are free to express the physical nature of who you are. You feel a level of compatibility and familiarity. Things are Pono.


I teach at Huna that connecting with the physical is a part of the path. We wouldn’t be given bodies and the world around us if we weren’t meant to do something with it.


So, back to the handling the question!


The student who came up to me and asked the question made my head snap. After further exploration of the situation, I was very clear of the dilemma. You are in a relationship with someone you love. You made a connection on the physical, emotional and mental. There is some compatibility on the spiritual. You have commitments, friends, family, obligations, history, and so much more. And yet in the words of this individual, “The connection with the other person is of a spiritual nature and it feels like our souls know each other.”


Being very respectful, I asked if anything had happened, and the answer was “no,” yet the energy has shown the connection on the Spiritual, Mental and Emotional are there with this other person. And, this individual said…. “I don’t know what to do!”


I get asked some tough questions and I felt in my heart that the energy was sincere. I have talked to people that asked me if they should get together with someone else because they are very attractive, or “hot”. That was not this case.


My Response:


I could only say to this person, “Keep that spiritual connection and let the path run its course. If it is meant to be, it will happen. If it is not, the energy will turn the relationship into what it needs to be.”


You see, you know it is a spiritual connection, because the physical ones would have caused them to “hook up” already. Now I get that desire was there for this person, and yet at the same time, there was a calmness and patience in the energy. As if everything was going to be alright. That is spirit! When you know in your heart something is meant to be and everything will be ok, you know that connection is pure.


I also did say that I need to be direct and point out, that this type of connection should be treasured. You don’t find this very often, and when you do, it is next to impossible to shut it off. When you connect at that level, there is something that is meant to be. You can direct the energy flow, and if it is meant to be, then it will happen.


I am sure this student wanted a more solid answer, and really, I wish I could give one. I asked permission to share this and the only requirement was no name.


Treasure your connections and enjoy the path!


Dr. Matt